When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors of the house where the disciples had met were locked for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”

A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name. John 20:19-31

It’s been a quiet week at Crown and Cactus Lutheran Church, that little congregation over between Mesa and Gilbert and Chandler. There hadn’t been any baptisms this year at the Sunrise Service but under Jennie Craster’s direction the Creative Spaces group had more than matched the decorations at last year’s service. The fountain, which initially had been planned for use only in the Easter season, had remained in place through the entire year. On Saturday they’d given it a thorough deep cleaning and filled it with fresh water–a couple of folks had mentioned that they thought it was beginning to smell like a public pool, and that just wouldn’t do. Again they had a whole variety of green plants, ferns, and potted palms strategically placed in the chancel area, and it did really look like a garden.

When he had gotten down to the church about 4:30 Pastor Baldridge was thanking God that the service was going to be indoors. It doesn’t rain often in Arizona, but the timing of this storm was terrible. Mel Falstaff, well-prepared as always, had checked the weather and had ordered about a dozen umbrellas just in case. So when people arrived, members of the Intentional Greeters group met them in the parking lot and walked them into the church. It was a nice touch, and a great way to demonstrate hospitality. He’d even gotten hold of some larger umbrellas that could be placed in stands to provide shelter for people to eat their Easter brunch outside between services. There were a lot of people, more than usual, and his crew had quite a workout while making sure that everyone was warmly welcomed. They made an attempt to get names of visitors while escorting them to the welcome table, but given the chaos they did miss a few.

Mel’s group has been doing their intentional welcoming all through the year now and they have the details down pat. Mel is still contacting new folks the week after their visits, and since he has a passion for that sort of thing, it’s gone rather well. Quite a few folks have become a part of the regular worshiping community, and he’s incorporated several into the Intentional Greeters crew.

 They started the service at 6:30 and began with the sanctuary in darkness as Lacey Zeiner, playing the role of Mary Magdalene wearing a full blue robe, walked slowly to the front of the church while the choir sang “In The Garden,” just as had been done the year before. And all in all, things went well. The choir sang at both services, and because the hymns were familiar the congregational singing was robust and full of enthusiasm. Even Pastor Baldridge seemed to have more energy than usual, probably because he’d been meditating on resurrection through the whole season of Lent. It’s taken him a long time but he’s finally gotten away from some of his old notions of what resurrection is about and is beginning to understand that the whole creation reeks of resurrection all through the year, and that it’s actually an integral part of reality in our universe. He still doesn’t understand what happened with Jesus, but he’s more than okay with the mystery of it all.

Prisha Patel, who typically doesn’t come to worship, was there for the second service on Easter, and afterward made it a point to search out Pastor Baldridge and thank him for making it possible to start the meditation classes at Crown and Cactus. She said, “I liked what you said about Jesus and resurrection this morning. Even though I’m a Hindu I love the image of the new and transformed life that you described. I hope you don’t mind that I worship with you on your holiest day. Everyone is very welcoming.”

Pastor Baldridge laughed and gave her a hug. “Of course you’re welcome, and one of these years I plan to make it to Holi. I hear it’s a wonderful time of joy and celebration. I think I’d like it. And thank you for keeping us in good financial order. Carl tells me that he’s impressed and that you’re doing a bang-up job.”

Late Sunday afternoon, Pastor Baldridge and Helga went over to Mel and Lil Falstaff’s home for what Lil called a lite “lupper,” which is something between a lunch and supper. They had some ham and bagels, a tasty three bean salad, some fruit, and a scrumptious blueberry dessert. Mel and Lil don’t have children, so they’re kind of in the same boat as the Baldridge’s on holidays. They talked a bit about that as they ate. Neither couple regrets not having children, but there are some occasions that seem to revolve around kids, and in those moments they feel a little left out.

Mei said, “Today I saw young people at worship that I hardly recognized. They’d come with their parents and it had been years since I’d seen them. They’re all grown up! It got me thinking about whether they worship when they’re not home visiting. I noticed that some didn’t sing the hymns, though they surely knew them once. They were pleasant and polite but I had the definite feeling that they were only there to please their moms and dads.”

Helga got up  to help Lil clear the table–they were going to play some cards in the evening. Pastor Baldridge could hear them talking out in the kitchen. He said to Mel, “Well, I saw the same kids. I had some of them in confirmation class, and I still remember their confirmation days. I think you’re right. Most of them have zero interest in church. That’s one of the reasons I like what Lacey is doing in Tempe. She’s actually reaching some of those kids who dropped out a long time ago. The difference between those young people and the ones we saw at church today is that the ones visiting today aren’t in the streets. Life has been good to them. They have no need of worship.”

Mel said, “I’ve been thinking about something I’d like to throw at you. It’s been my observation that Lutherans are pretty affirming when it comes to doubt. We tell people not to worry if they have doubts, that even the disciples doubted the resurrection. I think that you’ve always talked about your own doubts, and have done a good job of reassuring people that they’re not alone if they wonder about things. For the most part I’ve appreciated that, and I suppose it’s helped me deal with my own doubts.”

Pastor Baldridge caught the wording, “for the most part,” and asked if Mel was questioning his approach. Mel hesitated, and then said, “Well, yes, I guess I am. I’m wondering if sometimes we don’t get so comfortable with doubting that we never get around to believing…and if that’s the case, I think that’s tragic. I’m thinking of the text for next Sunday, the one about Thomas. We call him Doubting Thomas, but maybe we should call him Believing Thomas. When Jesus saw him he said,  ‘Do not doubt, but believe.’ And then he said, ‘Blessed are those who have not seen, yet have come to believe.’ John wrote his whole gospel so that people might become believers.”

Pastor Baldridge asked, “Okay, I get what you are saying. What do you suggest we do about it?”

Just then Lil and Helga came back into the room. Lil said, “My, my, what sober looking faces. I thought today was Easter. We should be celebrating.”

Mel and Pastor Baldridge just looked at each other. Mel said, “Oh, we were just talking about doubt and faith. Is it possible to damage faith by encouraging doubt?”

“Ooh, good question,” Helga said. “What’s the answer?” And she looked at Pastor Baldridge.

Pastor Baldridge’s head was starting to hurt and he suddenly felt very tired. He managed an “I don’t know,” as he shrugged his shoulders. He wished there were a formula to turn doubters into believers, but he’d never run across one. He only knew kids can’t be forced to believe. He said, “It sounds like a copout, but I think it’s a Spirit thing,” and managed a wry smile for Mel’s sake.

Mel smiled back. He hadn’t meant to put Pastor Baldridge on the spot–and he knew there wasn’t an answer to the question. But the seeming unbelief of those kids in church had started him down a rabbit hole. He said, “I guess all we can do is keep telling our faith stories every chance we get. That’s the only thing that might make a difference.”

And that’s the word from Crown and Cactus Lutheran Church, where all the men are committed and the women are faithful, and all the children are growing in grace…and maybe even faith as well.