And just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life. “Indeed, God did not send the Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. Those who believe in him are not condemned; but those who do not believe are condemned already, because they have not believed in the name of the only Son of God. And this is the judgment, that the light has come into the world, and people loved darkness rather than light because their deeds were evil. For all who do evil hate the light and do not come to the light, so that their deeds may not be exposed. But those who do what is true come to the light, so that it may be clearly seen that their deeds have been done in God.” John 3:14-21

It’s been a quiet week at Crown and Cactus Lutheran Church, that little congregation over between Mesa and Gilbert and Chandler. Pastor Baldridge has long lamented the fact that spring break always comes during the Lenten Season. No sooner has the congregation gained momentum in ministry than he gets word that spring break is coming, and because districts and charter schools operate independently of each, there is no common calendar. Essentially, because of the varying schedules, the heart gets ripped out of Lent, and the congregation limps through the season that is supposed to present the greatest opportunity for spiritual growth. Sometimes he longs for the good old days when churches dictated to the community, and schools were forced to get in line with what was happening in the congregations. It wasn’t that long ago that no schools would hold activities on Wednesday evenings–”church night” was inviolate. Teachers weren’t even allowed to assign homework! Now it’s anything goes! Even Sunday mornings are used for soccer games and practices of all kinds. The congregation have to be content with the leftover times, or force families to choose.

That’s what the staff had to listen to last Monday as they gathered for their weekly meeting. Of course they’re used to it–he rants like this every year. When he was done they did their usual reflection on how things had gone in worship and their current challenges in ministry. None of them dared to suggest that they simply cancel all activities for the next couple of weeks to accommodate those who would be going out of town. Crown and Cactus will stand alone in continuing its weekly schedule–Pastor Baldridge doesn’t believe that people need a break from church and none will be offered. And mostly the staff is okay with that–if they do discover that families are going out of town for a week or so they make adjustments. 

In fact, at Crown and Cactus a group of people have decided to double down on Lenten weekly activities. They reason that since schools aren’t scheduling during spring break there will be more, and not fewer, opportunities for worship, fellowship, and learning. As a result there’s a full calendar every Wednesday evening. It all starts with a soup and bread meal about 5:30. There are some folks who are into healthy eating and this is their innovative ministry effort. They experiment with recipes and then share them, and people have really appreciated it. Generally there have been a lot of beans, vegetables, and spices, and very little meat. A couple have even been bringing desserts, usually a no-no during Lent, but acceptable at Crown and Cactus. After the meal the schedule is full…first comes a half hour meditative service similar to Holden Evening Prayer put together by Janice Porter and featuring a variety of instruments. The music alone is inspiring but Lacey Zeiner has been offering some meditative gems based on the weekly psalms that some say ought to be published. 

After worship there are confirmation classes, activities for younger children, and of course choir practice. It makes for a full evening, but it’s been very well received. In fact, by doing some advertising at spring training venues, they’ve managed to attract a fair number of baseball people. Cub fans in particular seem receptive to the free meal and worship. With each week, more have shown up! 

This Wednesday, after engaging in conversation with visitors and helping to clean up in the fellowship area, Pastor Baldridge went out to the Briar Bench to relax and say good-night to everyone as they left. He loves this time by himself and was offering prayers of thanksgiving that the congregation had managed to turn spring break into a blessing rather than a curse. It has given him the spiritual boost that his heart has needed.

As he sat there in the shadows he noticed someone walking across the parking lot toward the sanctuary doors. At first he thought it was one of the choir members–Janice had told them to take their music home to practice–perhaps one of the tenors had forgotten. But it wasn’t a tenor or a bass, it was Syd! Pastor Baldridge was happy to see him but wondered why he was there–and why he was walking. The church was about 10 miles from downtown Tempe and not an easy jaunt for anyone.

Syd was surprised when he’d greeted him from the darkness of the bench. As it turned out he’d been heading for the bench himself. Lacey had told him stories of Myrtle Briar and had said her spirit lurked there in the darkness. Syd had some questions and had thought perhaps she might help him with answers. He said all this quite sheepishly–he didn’t really believe in such things. But when Lacey spoke he took her seriously, and so he’d come. Since he didn’t have a car he’d come by bus, transferred a couple of times, and had then walked about a mile.

He told Pastor Baldridge, “I actually like being out alone at night. There’s something about the darkness that energizes me. I think it stems from my time as a teenager when I went out every night to mess around with my friends. The darkness was like an invisibility cloak–and we could get away with just about any mischief we wanted.”

Pastor Baldridge smiled, “John, the gospel writer, had noticed that. He even says that people loved darkness because their deeds were evil, and that’s why they didn’t believe in Jesus.”

Syd said, “Yeah, I remember reading that when I was in prison. I don’t know why, but even though I now believe in Jesus, I still love the darkness. I’m comforted by it…and I’m certainly not covering up my evil deeds any longer.”

After a laugh Pastor Baldridge asked, “So what was it you wanted to ask Mabel? I’m not nearly the saint that she is, but she did teach me a lot of things.”

Syd paused for a moment. He’d expected that he’d just be thinking his thoughts, but if Pastor Baldridge was to be his advisor, he’d have to say them out loud, and that wasn’t easy for a quiet guy. Finally he said, “Well, it’s really about Jesus. I just don’t understand the connection between my belief and his death. Can’t I believe in him and commit my life to him without connecting it to the cross? I just don’t get how his death is connected to me,,,I know I’m repeating myself but I am confused.”

Pastor Baldridge reassured Syd, “Oh, don’t worry about that. It’s confusing to a lot of people. They just don’t try to figure it out like you do. Let me see if I have words that can help you.”

“When Jesus was involved in ministry many people became his disciples. They were drawn to him by his words and deeds and his promise of new life. It wasn’t so that they would go to heaven when they died but so they could have life now. In him the kingdom of heaven had come to them.”

Syd said, “Right, and he hadn’t even died yet.”

Pastor Baldridge went on, “That’s right, but after his death and resurrection his disciples taught that people hadn’t missed out. They could still believe in him and they could still receive that gift of life. And John taught that when he died on that cross he had actually been lifted up like that bronze serpent in the wilderness. Jesus on a cross became a focal point for the believers’ eyes and for their imaginations. John even wrote that Jesus’ last words were “It is finished!” His ministry was over, and this was his last act. And it’s really true. It’s on the cross that we see Jesus in all his glory. His unconditional, self-giving love was on display for all to see. Everything that we know and love about Jesus is wrapped up in the cross.” He paused, suddenly doubting that his words were anything but garbled. “Does that make any sense? Maybe I should just let Myrtle talk.”

They sat for some time, feeling comfortable in each other’s presence, but not knowing quite what to say. Suddenly there was a rustling sound right behind them. It was coming from the vicinity of the bougainvillea bush and together they turned toward it. They froze in anticipation and waited, but there was nothing. A small rabbit moved out of the darkness and into a patch of moonlight, and both of them sighed.

Syd resumed their conversation, “So basically you’re saying that Jesus being lifted up on the cross gave people a better view of him? That sounds almost silly.”

“I guess it does,” Pastor Baldridge said, “now that you put it that way. But it’s not just so that people in the last row of the crowd could see better, it’s so that we could see better. We can actually see him from 2000 years away.  I really believe that if Jesus hadn’t been crucified we wouldn’t even have heard of him. No other death could have had that kind of impact.”

Syd rolled that thought over in his head and said, “Now that sounds like something Myrtle would have said! I’m going to have to roll that over in my head for a while but maybe there’s something there. Thanks! If you don’t mind, I’m going to stay here a while. I know you’re probably worn out from the evening…and I bet your wife would love to see you.”

Pastor Baldridge offered to give Syd a ride back to Mill Avenue, but Syd turned him down. He knew the bus schedule and there was plenty of time, and besides, he waid with a smile, he still loves the darkness. He did accept a prayer though, and Pastor Baldridge, laying his hands on Syd’s head, offered praise and thanksgiving for Jesus and for the gift of belief that now belonged to them both.

Syd looked up, received the mark of the cross on this forehead, and with tears in his eyes, said “Thanks…maybe next week I’ll come for the soup.”

That’s the word from Crown and Cactus Lutheran Church, where all the men are faithful, the women are committed, and the children are all growing in grace.